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I’m so fucking furious. I have no clue why all I know is I’m mad at everyone but mostly at myself and I want to cut and scream and cry but mostly I just want to die. I just want to take a ton of pills and die but I can’t because instead I have to go to work and class and study for stupid finals when I no longer give a fuck what happens to me, but I’m embarrassed and afraid of what other people may say so instead I keep at it anyway. And then people tell me I need to stop being so selfish.
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No matter what external events occur in my life and how many great people I know and how many people express their concern and care for my well being there will still always be this pain that I feel. I don’t know where it comes from and what it is and it can go away for awhile and I can distract myself from it with drugs and conversations and tv shows but it always comes back. And I’m scared it’s never going to go away and that is the biggest reason I want to kill myself, because I just don’t ever think I’m going to feel complete and whole and happy, its just not for me. And maybe its because I don’t want to put in the work to achieve it, or maybe its because I’m incapable of feeling it. But I don’t particularly care anymore. I’m so tired of living. I’m tired of feeling and breathing and eating and sleeping. I’m tired of being my shitty self.
I know it’s trendy to fight the system and cry that we are all becoming slaves of technology, but this attitude overlooks that computers and phones are tools for communicating. When someone thinks I’m an idiot smiling at a machine, I’m actually smiling at my girlfriend who is 10000 miles away and whom I would have never met if not for these newfangled electronics. As they say: when the wise man points to the moon, the fool looks at the finger.
This is a topic that I’ve been wanting to tackle for a while now; much credit to this excellent post for bringing it to the front of my brain.
I want sleeves .-.
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Its nights like tonight where I’d really just like someone to cuddle me and kiss me and tell me nice things and let me do the same that I miss being in a relationship. Or even just someone who would quietly do their own thing while I paint and just let me enjoy their physical company.
In medieval culture, an event like a royal christening is not a private party; it’s the public social event of the year. To not invite any person of rank to such an event is a deadly insult.
Maleficent is certainly someone you wouldn’t want at a party, but she’s also someone powerful enough that only a fool would ever dare treat her with such blatant disrespect. The only way the King and Queen could possibly have gotten away with not inviting Maleficent was to not invite any of the fairies at all; inviting the other fairies and excluding her is explicitly taking sides in the conflict between the fairy factions.
Which means they made themselves her sworn enemies, and she responded by treating them as such from then on. If you actually get into analyzing the social dynamics of the scene, it’s very clear that Maleficent was willing to show mercy at first by giving the King and Queen a chance to apologize for their disrespect to her. She doesn’t curse Aurora until after she gives them that chance and they throw it back in her face with further disrespect.
And yeah, if the King and Queen had done the properly respectful thing and invited her, Maleficent would have given Aurora a scary awesome present. Moreover so would the other fairies, because at that point both sides would be using it as an opportunity to show off and one-up each other. What they gave her before Maleficent showed up was basically just trivial party favors by fairy standards.
How do you know so much about the social dynamics of medieval fairies
How don’t you
THE MAGIC BEGINS - A scene you really wanted to be in the movies, but wasn’t: Kreacher’s tale
war kills people from the inside out sometimes
“In war, there are no unwounded soldiers.”
i think i’ve posted this before but it’s so powerful
never not reblog this
Cheshire Cat by Joe Wierenga
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